My story begins in elementary school, First grade. Making friends wasn’t easy for me, I was alone most of the time, and the students simply didn’t like me, because I was overweight. They’d laugh, and make jokes such as “all you do is eat.” It never really got to me like it did in middle school. My hair was frizzy, and I had gained weight. I’d get made fun of every single day, from the day I walked in in the morning, from the very moment I stepped into my mothers car sobbing.
The bullying I had to endure was something I don’t wish upon anyone.
Every morning I’d beg my mom to PLEASE let me stay home from school, because I was going to be tortured again. She obviously had to make the choice of making me go, which I never held against her. So I went. I had no friends, and, before I continue, when I say “I had no friends” I don’t mean “I had some friends but I just didn’t include them.” It means, I had NO friends. I stood alone behind the school waiting for the first period bell to ring to start the day. 10 minutes after my mom dropped me off, though, things would get bad. Students would surround me, 7 to 12 as an estimate, calling me fat, gross, ugly, and boys would spit in my hair, claiming it made it look shiny. Girls would come up to me and ask me why I hadn’t killed myself yet, because no one cared about me. They’d throw hard, pods that fell from trees at my face and body, making everyone but me laugh. In tears, I’d call my mother who had JUST dropped me off no more than 10 minutes prior, begging her to pick me up, before the first bell even rang for first period. If she said no, I’d cry the entire morning as they would continue to make fun of me. I’d lay my head down on my desk and just cry, hoping the teacher would notice and give me some seriously needed help, but he never did. He sat there and watched as boys threw spit balls at me, in my hair, in my face. He sat there while these boys, and some girls, harassed me the entire period. In every one of the seven classes I took every day, 4-9 people tortured me in EACH CLASS. At lunch, I’d buy food with the money my mother paid for, and the boys in front of me would TAKE IT off of my tray, telling me I don’t need any food. That I had enough. Students made a song about me, about how overweight I was, and they’d sing, laugh, and point in class as loud as they could, and the teacher would sit there and laugh with them, and do absolutely nothing. I would leave school every day of my life sobbing, hating myself. Wanting to end it all. My parents fought constantly because of me, my father screaming ! at me, telling me I needed to get over it. I was lost. The councilor told me to give her all the names of my bullies, and they would never know who told. I felt like something was finally going to be done. Once I gave the gigantic list of names to her, she said she’d be calling them into her office one by one. The next day, people looked at me hatefully, holding bullying packets. BULLYING PACKETS?! They harassed me every single day of my life and all they were given was bullying packets that had to be signed by their parents, and to make matters worse, when I sat at my desk in 7th period (which was packed full of my bullies, give or take one) they were talking about how this dumb bitch told on them, and the substitute teacher laughed and said “Who is dumb enough to tell on you guys” and they ALL pointed DIRECTLY AT ME and said at the same time, “HER!”
The teachers let me down, the councilors let me down, I had no one. The substitute teacher had to keep me after school let out because she was terrified that I was going to get jumped. My mom had to park closer to school every day because she was also afraid.
Eventually, I simply stopped going, because no one would help me, no one cared. They simply let me drown. I dropped out of school because my harassment and torture was too much to handle. It was either drop out or commit suicide. I lived because I dropped out, which is extremely sad. Everyone always says to ask teachers for help, ask principals for help, well, I did. And they didn’t help me. They sat and watched the entire thing happen in front of them. One teacher, when I begged him to move students that were harassing me, told me to grow up. The vice principal promised me my bullies would never know who told on them, but they knew, and I had to pay for it.
I’ve suffered long term depression and anxiety, and my life is in ruin even today, simply because NO ONE would stand up and HELP me. And apparently Florida has a NO BULLYING law. Are you kidding me?
PLEASE!!! If you see someone getting bullied, stand up, HELP THEM, be a friend to them. You have NO IDEA how bad bullying can really get. If you don’t… they might end up like me. An 18 year old drop out, who is afraid of her own shadow and who sits at home every day crying her eyes out wishing someone did something.
YOU CAN SAVE LIVES IF YOU SIMPLY STAND UP.